One Million Miles With One Step
by gioalle1
Summary: A private moment in the life of Regina Mills; an inner battle between who she was and who she has become.


She was having a shower. It was 9 pm and her routine followed precisely the same pattern of the last 29 years. The water was maybe too hot and her shoulders began to turn red, but the feeling on her skin was still pleasant, a mixture of warm and pain she had always enjoyed.  
Alone in her bathroom, she felt again that familiar sense of loneliness; that emotion wasn't exactly part of the emotional background of 28 years living in Storybrooke, it could mostly be connected with those five months without her.  
Her enemy.  
Her antagonist.  
Emma Swan.  
The water was steaming, movements were slow and distant.

* * *

_Slow_, like those five months, surprisingly spent walking around her town, trying to meet a pair of green eyes.  
_Distant_, like the world where her antagonist was.

She wanted to fight with her, to argue or even to punch her on her face again. She needed her enemy, because every character in every story needs someone to create conflicts. Her life needed that specific conflict just to move on, to make progress, to feel alive. Because apparently, 28 years spent without Emma Swan had less events to remember that one single year of having her in Storybrooke.

During that period, Regina Mills had been pushed away from her happy ending. Storybrooke, and the empty lives of her inhabitants, were supposed to be her happy ending.  
Emma Swan had pushed it away. Even Henry, the only good thing in her life, the only thing that could make her feel alive and loved, had pushed her away.  
The curse had been broken. Emma, the savior, had found her mission. And she had completed it, not without proving that she could also save the life of her enemy.  
From an angry mob.  
Or from a wraith.  
Or from a vortex leading to another world.

The savior had been brave. She had been good in solving problems, fighting and surviving. And coming back home, afterwards.

Regina really had tried hard to find the same hate she felt at the beginning, for Emma. She wanted to feel that repulsion again, like the first time they met, but she couldn't.  
Watching the Sheriff coming out from the well, created a sense of relief in her heart. Doing that heroic action was an effect of something she wanted to prove to her son, to Henry.  
Obtaining a successful result, was something she did for herself.  
To have Emma back in Storybrooke again.

Regina knew it would have been dangerous to have the Savior back in her life, again. She also knew that the distance between she and Henry could became even bigger. Because good kids choose heroes, and not Evil Queens.

The frustration she felt, soon after Emma came back, was difficult to handle.  
Locking herself at home, as a voluntary prisoner, was a partial relief since she could avoid meeting inquiring, and still angry, pairs of eyes belonging to each and every citizen of Storybrooke who didn't mind showing her some disdain.

_Two days_.  
It took two days for Regina to hear again the unfamiliar sound of someone knocking at her door. She didn't answer, because the mutual agreement between her and the world outside was that everyone could come in her house, and she could go out only if accompanied by some dwarf or guard.

_Steps_.  
Discrete but confident steps were approaching.  
Regina was in her office, doing nothing but watching the fireplace. She thought she could also stop calling that room "her office", since there were no particular activity, related to some kind of job, she could do.

Maybe she could also stop wearing those mayoral dresses, or to wear make up.  
Lost in her thought, she was surprised when a familiar presence, with a regained cinnamon scent and wavy blonde hair, opened the door.  
The sword was firmly in her hand, a gesture she probably found reassuring from her five months spent in the Enchanted Forest. But the attitude was far from being menacing.

Regina, for the second time in two days, felt lucky to meet those green eyes. Anyway, she was too good at hiding every kind of emotion, so she just wore her usual, cold mask.

"I didn't know you were a prisoner in your own house..."  
Regina didn't answer.  
Emma made a step towards her.

"...I thought I could see you around town..."  
Regina didn't answer. Again. Not that she could answer to a statement, by the way.  
Emma made a further step towards the former mayor, who was still sat on her armchair.

"...and I'm wondering why I haven't stopped thinking about you for a single moment in the last five months."  
Regina could have used sarcasm, or being simply rude, but a subtle smile was a natural answer to that statement. And she couldn't really hold it back.

"I need answers, Regina."  
The following step allowed Emma to be even closer to the former mayor.  
So close she could see her expression, behind that unexpected smile.  
So close she could perfectly see her lip scar, decorating that smile.

"I need answers, Regina." she repeated.  
"I need time. But mostly, I need _you_."

* * *

Regina turned off the water. She lost track of time, under that extremely hot water.  
Regina needed time, too. And time was what she had. Four months after that meeting, and a really long shower after, she reminded those words whispered by Emma.  
"I need you".  
Regina needed Emma, too.

And Emma was simply waiting for her lover in their bed.


End file.
